Yet by some twist of fate I was somehow accepted. And by
another, equally twisted turn of fate, one
of the workshops offered on the 4talent day was ‘Comedy Sketch Writing’,
along with the terrifying ‘Introduction to Acting’ and ‘Television Presenting’.
So I found myself sitting, yawning, on a five hour Megabus heading from Leeds
to London, possibly heading towards disaster – I envisioned myself being
accidentally placed in the Acting workshop, having to do some sort of mad
improvisational performances in front of some very serious, smirking actors who
could tell I was just an amateur that had blindly stumbled in by accident.
However, despite me being overdramatic (ironic, I know), the
day was a blast from start to finish. Upon arrival, we were given one half of a
pair on a label, an ‘ice-breaking’ activity. I got given roll. And therefore
instantly embarrassed myself by, instead of thinking of media-esque
partnerships (it was rock, of course), my stomach took over my brain as I
exclaimed ‘Oh, am I looking for sausage?’ Tragic.
Yet an hour later I had forgotten all about this euphemism,
as I was sat gawking three rows back from the beautiful Zawe Ashton, who plays one
of the best characters of all time, Vod from Fresh Meat. Telling us about her former roles, which primarily consisted of prostitutes and crack whores,
and how her dad’s raised eyebrow gave her the incentive to strive for more, I
just sat there dumbfounded that she was actually in the same room as me. I half
expected her to do something Vodlike: jump on the nearest table and release a
stream of fake blood from her knickers, or light a spliff in the middle of her
talk, but she was completely normal (if amazing and hilarious and inspiring are
listed next to normal in the dictionary).
The day followed just as magically, with a workshop with two
brilliant comedy sketch writers who taught us the tricks of the trade, and
engaged us in some hilarious activities which proved that anyone who has ever
been in an awkward or ridiculous situation can probably make a sketch out of
it.
At the end of the day we were in for another treat: multiple
famous people! There were actors from Run, Mogadishu, Hollyoaks, and Skins, and
many other t.v. shows which I forgot to take note of in my excitement (and
whilst hastily trying to take sneaky photos of them...what?). Being a bit of a
loser, I could think of nothing intelligent to ask them, and their hilarity
intimidated me, so I just hid at the back and let the real actors amongst us ask
all the clever questions.
Overall, it was a bloody brilliant day. Other highlights
include a talk from the casting director of Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit,
and some very useful advice from a top agent. Whilst the idea of acting still
terrifies me, I admire those who strive to do it, as I didn’t realise what hard
work it actually is. Good luck to all you aspiring actors and presenters, and
hopefully I’ll be writing your lines in the future!
